post twelve - what went down...

Every Wednesday the Student's Union at my university have an 'indie' night, where they play rock, indie, metal and various stuff that you wouldn't hear on a mainstream night. That means no Black Eyed Peas, no Baywatch theme and no Britney. It is precisely for that reason I go. Every week.

So this week, is the first week that my bastard ex-boyfriend decides to go. With the 'new' girl. and promptly comes to stand where I am, and snog her face off. Wanker. I dissappeared into the ladies where I sat crying for about an hour, with my friends rallying round, bitching about him as best they could. Eventually, CJ went out and told him he was being an asshole, and he came in to talk to me.

I didn't hold back. My friends were restraining towards the end. I told him it was an absolute kick in the teeth, as he never EVER came to this night with me, yet he was quite prepared to come with her. I screamed evey name under the sun at him, telling him he was a useless boyfriend and didn't deserve me, that I wasted a hefty proportion of my life on him, and that he through it all away for some tart he met over Christmas.

He sneered at me. 'Me and N have so much in common, and we never did. You don't own this night, I can come out if I want.'

I learnt the next day that 'N' was so upset at what I said to him, that she cried, and according to a certain tosser, noone has ever made her cry. Shows what a heartless bitch she is then! She knows exactly what she has done wrong, now she is paying for it in guilt.

I passed her in the High Street today. Looked her straight in the eye, then turned away with my head held high.

I have just heard that she was going to come and talk to me at the same time as him. If she had, she would have regretted it. I regret nothing of what I said, as every ounce of it was the truth. And there is so much I want to tell her about him, but I can't for fear of being seen as bitter and twisted.

Which of course I am, but with good reason!

post eleven - saturday blues

This has been a hideous week.

Still living with someone who breaks your heart and leaves for for someone else is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I can't leave this house, as I don't want to still have to pay the rent for somewhere I don't live, and he refuses to leave. One thing he did say to me though is that he would never bring her back here. He promised me.
Except that last night he broke this promise, and possibly his bed frame. She was obviously faking.

Still, on the bright side, I have a mighty army of friends around me who I can call upon should I need them. And this week, they have proved their worth many times over. I only hope that soon I shall be able to repay them.

And its also good to hear that I'm not the only one who has to deal with things like this. Its very tough at the moment, but I know I'm not alone. In fact, the primary reason I write this blog is as an outlet for everything that goes on in my head. To see something written down makes it easier to understand somehow!

post ten - the end of an era

My boyfriend of nearly two years doesn't love me anymore.

post nine - what not to wear

'You look like you've just come back from the stables. Is that what you're going out in?' JB, aka Dad.

'It is actually,' I reply. 'I've seen loads of girls around in skinny jeans and boots over the top. Kate Moss does it.'

'But baby,' he squeaks through his tears of laughter, 'you aren't exactly the same stature as Kate Moss...' Harrumph.

I head downstairs to the kitchen, where I am met with guffaws from HT and PJ.
'Hows the pony?' they cried.
I changed into a skirt.


Kate Moss never had to put up with this shit.

post eight - the journey

We all pile into PJ's Vauxhall Corsa. There are four of us. Naturally the two tallest, myself and JB, are shoved in the back. And climbing into the back of a car with only two doors has never been an easy feat for me. It makes me feel like I have an enormously large bottom. Which I don't*.

Our destination for the day: the next Town, as that is where the local government offices are. We are being sued by them for non-payment of council tax, so we have a bit of a problem. Being the non-tax-paying students that we are, we didn't find this out until we returned this week from our parents. Our supposed court date is Thursday.

So we leave our little cul-de-sac (read: narrow road in the Ghetto) and set off.
Twenty minutes later, we have driven a grand total of two hundred yards(they are installing a new traffic light system. Obviously it's not working.), and it dawns on us that we have absolutely no idea as to how to get to the council office. we make a conscious decision to turn back and get the SatNav (christmas present from Dad of PJ). Unfortunately for us, we are in a one way system and therefore have to drive around the entire town to get back to our house, thus adding another ten minutes to our journey. HT gets out, deciding to walk and therefore hoping to get there before us so we dont waste anymore time.

We arrive at the same time, HT having stopped for a beer along the way.


*This said, I don't buy jeans from GAP, as they are made for arses the size of pinheads. Maybe it's just me.